from despair.com, h/t julie d.
but i didn't think it was appropriate because i have not hit that particular wall.
just yet.
mom is doing great. as in really great, like she may be released from rehab friday because she is "too independent." praise God.
now for something you don't know - remember when i had the CT scan? when i went to the follow-up visit with my new doc, the report showed nodules on my kidneys and my thyroid. i found to today that the nodules on my kidneys were cysts (what does that mean?) but the nodule on my thyroid was really two nodules and one was "significant in size." with my lymph nodes in my neck still swollen and having this *issue*, it is time to seen an endocrinologist because it may be "significant."
well, now.
i told a friend recently that i am so tired of asking for prayer. i feel needy and angsty. i hate feeling like that; i guess i am as independent as my mother because i feel this way.
but if you feel so inclined, (to pray) have at it :)
22 comments:
I feel ya here (see my latest post) and so you have my prayers, as small as they are.
(((hugs))) and prayers from me :-)
Praying.
Got any Lourdes water? I know of two people who had cancer or weird spots, drank water from the spring at Lourdes, and the lady with cancer was cured (her doctors said there was no scientific explanation for the cancer going away), and my uncle with the spots the doctors thought were tumors disappeared after he drank the water.
Maybe you'd want to go to a healing Mass? There are a couple of charismatic communities near me (one at my home parish) who have healing Masses regularly and they are a great source of comfort for those who go (my father-in-law included). Even if there's nothing wrong with your body, it's good for your soul.
Of course I'll pray. :)
. . .
praying for you
Praying for you Penni...
from one independent woman to another (and we both know that independence is not always a good thing!)
penni, good to hear that your Mum has been doing so well. I hope you soon know more about what lies ahead for you about your thyroid. Peace and every best wish.
Margaret
You, and your mom (so wonderful to hear she's recovering so nicely), have been in my prayers and will continue to be. I know it's hard, but until you know something definitive, keep breathing deeply and let His love and warmth enfold you Penni...
I'll take you out on my daily walk around the pond with my rosary.
Ave
(((Penni)))asking for prayer requires great humility - yet it's biblical. In James we are told that if we don't ask we don't get - harsh reality! -
but now you've shared the news and some of he fears we're praying for you - and asking God for healing
Penni- my kids and I have you and your family in our prayers.
Lisa
Ah, sister-of-the-heart, I think Lorna pricked both our balloons...
Tired of being broken. Tired of being needy. I should be able to handle this. I should be past this.
Yeah...right.
People who need prayer (like me) never think about the fact that by asking for prayer, by admitting to weakness or need, that we are (1) allowing others into our lives in a powerful way, and (2) giving others a chance to get out of their own daily tragedies and focus on others.
It's a truism in the recovery communities - my recovery begins when I ask for help. Still, I hate it, because I want to be stronger, better, more of a spiritual Man of Steel rather than the Kewpie doll I so often feel like.
/sigh/
(I love the picture, by the way. It's exactly how I feel right now. I went to the website, and just laughed...)
Unfortunately, you also touch a tender spot at this end. Swollen lymph nodes are a red-alert sign in my family. My dad ignored them for months, hearing crap from doctors that "oh, it's just your new deodorant irritating you," etc., etc. By the time someone said, "Let's just biopsy the damn things," two years had gone by and it was too late. I'm not a doctor, but I do know this fact: action conquers fear. Stomp your feet until someone checks it out.
One doctor was giving me the runaround when I had swollen lymph nodes in my armpit. "We can hold off, see if it goes down." I looked at him and said, "My father died of lymphatic cancer at 54. We aren't going to 'hold off' on anything. When can you schedule the biopsy?"
The answer was, "In two days." It was benign - but it was worth it.
You go to the top of my prayer list today, sister...sending great big e-hugs from Ohio...
Everything is going to be ok Penni, I can feel it.
When a nodule on my thyroid was discovered, my doctors were greatly relieved when they found the one was two. Apparently two thyroid nodules are better than one. My two were benign. ((hugs)) I will keep you wrapped in prayer.
Great news about your mum, Pen... and I will light a candle for you tonight. I have been doing that a lot lately... big hugs...
{{{Penni}}}
hinds, i would think the same thing, but when one is larger in size and you have swollen cervical lymph nodes at the same time (and for two months standing), it paints an entirely different picture.
not that i looked anything up on the internet or anything.
:: blink, blink ::
thank you all, as usual, for rallying around my angsty, needful self. if i didn't have you all praying for me, i'd feel pretty much on my raft by myself, once again. now i have company :)
praying tonight...
My dear M2 -- As much as I enjoy reading through all of those Demotivational posters, I would much rather be praying for you....
Peace.
APN
In my weakness I allow God to be my strength.
I will pray, Penni. Of course you're overwhelmed. I know you want to serve God, but remember that Jesus came (the scandal) to serve us through dying for us. This is a time where Jesus will help.
One of mine was definitely larger in size than the other. The one was visibly obvious when looking in a mirror, the other one I could not feel myself.
I understand the angst though. Nodes worry me too. ((hugs))
God controls the waters your raft is on. He's not surprised by any of this, and He loves you so.
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