had a bit of an "in my head" day, but actually, it was for two friends - one was going to court to find out if he would be potentially jailed or not and the other has been visiting her love who just underwent surgery to remove a mass on his brain - he was in a meeting last saturday and had a difficult time speaking. he was rushed to the hospital and they found the mass they previously had no idea about. talk about your life changing in an instant...prayers for them would be tremendously appreciated.
the outcomes: my friend is not going to the big house (yay, thank you Lord!) and my friend's love is i guess doing as well as can be expected. i haven't heard her voice in three days so i am unsure, but have been storming the heavens on their behalf and know God has things well under control.
late in the day, i made plans with two other AAs to go to the Rescue Mission for their 6 p.m. meeting. between the phone call to make those plans, i talked with another friend from my morning meeting and invited her to come along. as it turned out, she did, but i was running late and she arrived in the parking lot before i did. she didn't know the two other women, but when they pulled into the parking lot, she said, "can i come with you?" and they said "you have to have an rsvp for where we are going!" and three new kinships were made.
the meeting was really great. i saw a seat in the back row in between two men (where else would i be?) and said "how lucky am i to be sitting next to the two most handsome men in the place?" and just marveled over the packed room and how we all had one common thread running throughout our tapestries. we talked about slips and letting go and letting God and the one gentleman to my left nudged me about mid-way through and when i looked over at him, he handed me one of his last two starbursts. i let it melt in my mouth because i was moved by the sweetness of it all and didn't want it to end.
i shared toward the end (i guess my hurt from before has dwindled and my introversion is really starting to fade away) and spoke of letting go and letting God - how i awoke on december 3rd and heard the Voice of God say "you are never to drink again" and that would never have come from me, so the way i see it, if i call myself a Christ-follower and believe there are three powers greater than me, myself and i (Father Son & Holy Spirit), that i need to take heed and walk in obedience...it was actually good to share and as i finished up, the gentleman to my right tapped my leg with his cane and said "that was really good - thank you for that!" and i sat in just a real happy bliss.
the end of the meeting came and i held the hands of my new friends and they both squeezed mine at different points of the Lord's prayer and i was awash in grace and goodness. after the end of the meeting, i spoke to the Gent to my Left (who had shared earlier about just wanting a tall can of beer when he got off the bus and saw the liquor store and "who would know?") and said, "you know they say the true character of a man is how he acts when nobody is around to notice" and he said "i know - if i took that beer, the only person i would have been fooling was myself because God already knows it all!" and with that, he said how nice it was to meet me - i offered my hand and he pushed it aside and gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek and said he hoped he would see me again.
more grace, more goodness.
chatting on the way back to the parking lot where our cars were was also awesome... only through this program could i find myself in a space where i am learning so much about myself and my brokenness and that it is all okay...
only in this program would someone approach a car with two women in it and say "can i come?"
...and only through the grace of God would i ever appreciate starburst and the Lord's prayer in such a sweet way.
(not to mention a kiss on the cheek...)