one drop of water.

as i drove home from mass this morning, i was thinking about (yet another) encounter with *helen* i have a hard time with her, i truly do. but i am thinking i understand a little clearer why God has her in my life.

she's the fidgety one a few pews ahead of me. has been known to sit next to me. the girl likes to yawn and stretch during mass...several times. cannot avoid seeing that happen. the handshake of peace is another story entirely, there isn't a soul she doesn't do the wave to - i mean, arm lifted over her head, big ole wave like she hasn't seen you for decades, full 360 degree circle so nobody is missed.

i am so not that cheerful, God bless her and have mercy on me (thank you, julie d., for my new fave catchphrase).

last week, i had an *incident* with her. remember when i asked you to pray for richard? i was talking with his mother after mass one day last week and found out he had been discharged from rehab and was inquiring about his progress when helen came up and stood there, between us. i looked at her and said, "hi helen - i'll be right with you." she said "that's okay" and proceeded to wait for me. didn't budge. i said, "this is a bit of a private conversation..." and she said to richard's mom, "i just wanted to say hi" and off she went. i felt like a troll, but didn't want richie's mom to feel compromised, and we finished our conversation.

this was on the blessing of the candles day, by the way, and as i was on my way up to get my candle from the altar, helen was waiting for me. impatiently i said "i have to get to work, helen..." and kept walking. she said, "oh, i just wanted to tell you something!!" of course, because now i am impatient and not really having to get to work just yet (felt the sting of my mistruth kick me in the butt), i said, "what is it?" she said, "i was asked to take Communion to the folks at the nursing home - i am so excited!!"

let's pause to feel for a moment exactly what it feels like to be the biggest schmoe that ever walked the face of the earth.

(pause longer, still)

okay, regrouped and said "that is wonderful - you will be great at it" then she chatted on for another minute or two and practically skipped out of church.

i felt like such a jerk. really, really jerky. i don't even have to ask God *why*, i just know that it was to show me that impatience is not His virtue.

so today, another helen encounter, but it's eased off a bit - i asked her how it went last week and she said it went well and she is helping distribute ashes tomorrow...as i was driving home and stopped at a red light, i was looking at the water collect at the top of my windshield. the lonely drop of water sort of meandered to the nearest drop of water close by, and together, they found yet another drop of water they took a liking too, as though by magnetic force. as it grew in size and strength, by the time it hit mid-windshield, there was no stopping it from gaining force and flowing down with ease and speed.

i watched several of them do this and was fascinated by it - God spoke a word to my heart saying that this is what He wants of His church, His community. not to be alone, not to be by one's self; community needs others to be strong. we need community to be the universal Church He has called us to be. He doesn't want us to go it alone. He doesn't want penni to be alone, He doesn't want helen to be alone...and that penni may need helen just as much as helen needs penni! He wants us to be community.

you would never think one little drop of water would make a difference ~ unless, of course, you are God and wanted penni to have a divine revelation while idling at route 9 & tilton road.

then it would make all the difference in the world.

so be it.