when we were at my brother's on Sunday, we were discussing my current condition (ahem.) and my sister said, "pen, it's just a test."
oh, really? is everything a test?
is every thing, every path, every choice -- all we do, day in and day out -- a big test from God?
does it come down to that for every single word we say, every thought we entertain, every conversation we hold, every solitary moment we enjoy (or don't enjoy, as has been my case as of late) -- as being a big test from God? < inside voice > is He looking over the rims of His glasses at me and wondering wtf i have been doing lately? < /inside voice >
is that how you view your life? i like to see life through the eyes of grace, that certain things that happen to my benefit, even the simplest action from a patient or a co-worker, as a moment of grace. i would hate to view everything as a test from God; i never tested well in school and know i am having a lot of *system failures* lately.
what do you think?