dreams.

i am a very vivid dreamer. i dream nightly and have instant recall of what it was exactly i was dreaming about.

some of it has been regarding my past, some of it, perhaps my future, i don't really know. some of it, quite horrific. in fact, i could probably give stephen king a run for his money.

it started about four years ago, when i had major surgery and shortly thereafter, started dreaming extremely vividly and they were what you would call *night terrors* night after night i'd wake up, drenched, screaming or crying aloud. my doctor told me that it could actually have been a severe *toxic* reaction to the anesthesia. he recommended a more organic route and suggested i go use milk thistle (which cleanses the liver) and other supplements that would increase my seratonin level.

that sort of worked. then it got to the point i was put on antidepressants to further raise my levels and it had the opposite affect as far as my dreams were concerned - they got more vivid than ever before, i dream in color, i remember all of them when i awake and with God's grace and mercy, by mid-day, they have all but been forgotten about.

another odd thing about myself i am going to reveal here is i have *flashes* about people. it sounds wierd, it is wierd, it's even strange writing it out, but i see people who i have never met and i get a revelation about them that could or could not be true...i've never approached someone and asked them if what i was *receiving* was true or not - they'd be floored over some of my *revelations.* please tell me i am not alone in this.

i dreamt last night about my former sister-in-law, who at one point was one of my best friends. it was so real, so natural that this morning i had an inclination to reach out for her. it's been several years since i've seen or spoken to her. i feel really compelled to seek her out, but how ridiculous is that notion?

i am kind of going on and on, but it's all jumbled in my head and all relevant or not to my spirituality. oftentimes, when i get these *flashes* i am compelled to pray for that person. same if i have dreamt of someone who has not even crossed my mind in years. chances are also really good that i will run into my sister-in-law (which has happened to me before, too...)

*sigh*

tell me i am okay.