i have been back to work since friday, last. worked a bit on saturday. wake up, clean up whatever left-overs from the day before need to be put into their places, and get ready to give moll her first dose of cefepime at 7am, which requires cleaning the area i will be using with anti-bacterial wipes, obtaining her med out of the fridge and the attendant saline and heparin flushes, alcohol wipes, paper towels, hand sanitizer, prayer.
then i go in and awake the princess. she has been an amazingly good sport.
digression: yesterday she started with a low-grade temp after having had a slight cough x two days. normally, i would ignore those symptoms and let the virus *run its course*; however, she was with her pediatrician at 4:45pm [after having spoken to the infectious disease people at duPont] and was given an inhaler and strict instructions as to what to do if things haven't cleared by friday. /digression
i have been making my AA meetings, which have been a tremendous help. i have been enjoying a book my friend Iz gave me called "Daily Affirmations for Adult Children of Alcoholics" (please sibs - don't get upset at the title...good stuff inside!) and have been tapping into God like i never have before.
what has been remarkable to me is that when i go through a something i consider to be of crisis proportions, i oftentimes lapse into the "why me"s. (i did ask when i was in the hospital why it took so long to manifest itself after the surgery, but that is a different question altogether.) my life is now filled to overflowing with commitments to others - i am truly happiest when i am helping someone else out. if you suffer from a scinitilla of the amount of selfishness as i do, i can assure you the quickest way out of your self is by helping someone else...this time is no different.
i have my family commitments, my work and my AA commitments. i consider everything i do now as being done as a somewhat of a helper to God. [i know, right?] they are responsibilities i am all too happy to shoulder. i am hoping i can stay in this frame of mind because i have been more content than i can recall for the longest time...i do get frustrated, don't get me wrong. i have a magnet on my fridge that reminds us that our "work is worship."
my life, at this moment, is filled with nothing less than holy days of obligation.
Moreover they are to abstain from those works and affairs
which hinder the worship to be rendered to God,
the joy proper to the Lord’s day...