treading water

i have a bit of anxiety.  you see, molly's been complaining of back pain.  on an almost daily basis.

i called her surgeon's office last and spoke with one of his PA's (Theresa, a love), and she said it could simply be from healing.

i am trying to trust in God.  trust trust trust.  hand it over to Him, take it back, hand it back, when i give in to thinking about the implications of said pain.  i truly am trying not to "go there," but even molly is making wincing faces when i ask how she's feeling.  :: dang ::

just throwing it out there (throwing it up here?)  i feel the panic wanting to show itself alive and thriving in the back of my throat.  i want the panic to go away, i want her to feel better, i want this to be over.

our next visit is on monday.  i am treading water to keep from sinking...i'm not one for leaning.